Green Smoothie Deep Thoughts

Farmhouse38 Green Smoothie via


I wanted to post this recipe, not so much to be jumping on the green smoothie bandwagon and pretending I re-invented the wheel, but more because I have a tendency to fall off said bandwagon, and then forget how I make it when I climb back on. So really, I’m just posting this for my own reference.

But also…I have thoughts. Sometimes. I know, I know–applause isn’t necessary. Thank you, though.

I always roll my eyes at these sorts of diet fads. People get crazy. Like: OMG…juice?! Smoothies? THIS IS GENIUS. Like we haven’t been squeezing fresh juice and making healthy smoothies for decades already. My mom used to squeeze my brothers and I fresh orange juice EVERY. SINGLE. MORNING. To the point where it was torture for us to drink it–but she insisted it was the best, healthiest way to drink orange juice. And, as much as I hate to say it (don’t make me say it!!!)…she was right.

In my adult years, I have tried to eat as much fresh produce as I possibly could. I’ve always been mindful of it, at least. Why the heck should I drink it? Especially when, all sorts of said fresh produce is blended together or juiced and, let’s be real here, it looks so gross. So gross. Why. Why would I do that? But when I really assessed my diet, as much as I thought I was doing well, I realized I was still falling short. And I suddenly realized that packing a smoothie full of all this great stuff was a very quick and easy way to pound it down.

And yes, I chose to make smoothies, not juice, because…at the end of the day, the choice was about waste. Juicing creates a whole lot of waste product, and I just couldn’t come to terms with that. When you put produce in a blender and make a smoothie, you’re using almost every last bit. And all those bits and pieces have good stuff in them that would otherwise go down the drain, in the trash, or in the compost. Might as well put them in your face.

So I tried it. I floundered for awhile and produced some really vile stuff. But finally, I arrived at the following formula, and I am pretty pleased with it. The steadfast carnivore Texan even likes drinking it. Whowuddathunk.

I am a big fan of the Vega products (and I’m not sponsored or have anything to do with them–I just want to share). These vegan, gluten-free, sugar-free protein smoothie mixes can be used alone, or thrown into your own smoothie blend. They ain’t cheap, but they are a fantastic source of all-natural, Non-GMO, plant-derived protein. And they taste great. I think I really became a fan of green smoothies when I found these products.

For two approx. quart-sized servings:

–3 cups water (for a slushier version, replace some of this with ice)

–1 scoop Vega mix or other protein smoothie mix of your choice

–juice of 1 lemon

–2 cups frozen power greens (kale, spinach, collards, whatever floats your boat)

–1 frozen banana

–1 cup frozen mango bits

–1 medium fresh apple

–1 large fresh carrot

Put everything in a high-powered blender and blend until smooth. If you don’t have a schmancy big-name blender (which I didn’t for a long time), put these ingredients in one at a time and blend them slowly. This makes two servings that are approximately 220 calories each (if you use the Vega mix–you’re on your own if you go rogue).

Side note: I buy mostly everything in bulk, fresh (or pull it straight from the garden), cut it up into manageable pieces and then freeze it so that it’s ready to go into the blender when I need it. You could do everything fresh and add ice to the equation, of course. I like to make a week’s worth of smoothies at a time, seal them in mason jars, and then take them out a day ahead of time and put them in the refrigerator to thaw. Works pretty well for us.

Cheers to green smoothiedom! (It would probably cancel out all the good stuff if I added Vodka, right? Just checking.)

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11 thoughts on “Green Smoothie Deep Thoughts

  1. Charlotte Zweigoron August 13, 2014 at 9:29 pm Reply

    Actually, I think the Vodka would get it into your system more quickly… and, if there were any stray bad things in there (even after freezing), it would kill ’em. Yeah, more good stuff faster… bad stuff deader’n’a’doornail… all good. I wonder if it would keep it from freezing solid?

    • farmhouseK8 August 13, 2014 at 9:47 pm Reply

      LOL–this sounds completely accurate to me! Thanks, Charlotte!

  2. Lisa Steele of Fresh Eggs Daily August 13, 2014 at 10:38 pm Reply

    OMG! I JUST bought a little smoothie book and started yesterday! I find it very convenient to just drink my breakfast/lunch instead of having to actually like use a fork or something. Salads take FOREVER to eat and I’m busy! And I want to get healthy and skinny…so yesterday I made one:
    Lime section
    Yuck. Looked really pretty until I blended it up.

    Today I made:
    Lime section
    Yuck. And actually looked better after I blended it up.

    I will try again tomorrow. At least I bought like 250 pretty colored thick smoothie straws on amazon so that’s fun anyway. I’m not digging the taste tho…must find a better recipe. I’ll check out the Vega mix.

    And for the record yes I think Charlotte is 10)% right. Vodka wouldn’t add any (many?) calories and would keep it from freezing solid. Perfect.

    • farmhouseK8 August 13, 2014 at 11:10 pm Reply

      LOL, Lisa!! There is a total learning curve!! I find that the banana (and I don’t even like bananas!!)and the juice of one lemon is essential to cutting out the bitterness of the greens…and then adding the Vega stuff really helps. But, at the end of the day, if it’s gross-tasting, at least you know it is darn good for you–so you hold your breath and pound. 😀

      • Lisa Steele of Fresh Eggs Daily August 13, 2014 at 11:14 pm

        And cute straws and drinking out of a mason jar…that helps too. Okay banana and lemon juice, I can do that. I bougth kale bc you know, it’s like THE smoothy green. I hope to make it ten days, we’ll see. I might just end up giving the kale to the ducks and making a batch of watermelon cucumber margaritas and be done with it!

      • farmhouseK8 August 13, 2014 at 11:38 pm

        Trust me, I hear ya! In the beginning, I was like: NOPE. But then I kept fiddling and found something that I actually liked. You just gotta keep fiddling. 🙂

      • Lisa Steele of Fresh Eggs Daily August 14, 2014 at 12:07 am

        I’ll try the banana and lemon juice tomorrow. I hate to give up the kale if I can work around it. I have a mango too..I’ll check back tomorrow and let ya know.

  3. Susan L. August 15, 2014 at 12:46 am Reply

    I skip the kale and use spinach instead. It has a much milder taste. I like to dehydrate kale to make kale chips with a little olive oil and salt.

    • home, garden, life August 18, 2014 at 1:22 pm Reply

      Kale is the superfood. Find fresh, tender kale at farmers markets. Many varieties and never better. Want my recipe for Kale Smoothie?

  4. home, garden, life August 18, 2014 at 1:17 pm Reply

    Check out smoothie recipes in Wahls Protocol. I have a kale smoothie every morning. Great way to get the veggies down and raw is best. Want the recipe?

  5. home, garden, life August 18, 2014 at 1:21 pm Reply

    AND I am addicted to the Magic Bullet by NutraBullet. (No I don’t work for them either!) Not sure why other commenters are finding kale bitter…kale is the superfood and when I buy at local farmers markets, NEVER bitter.

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